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2003-07-17 - 1.29pm��previous entry��next entry
Day 26 of the TTC cycle...
Hello people, I am attempting to be more "balanced" today, hehe!
It is Cycle Day 26, so I have four more days till my period is due. I am a bit crampy this morning, and I have slightly tender breasts (why do fertility boards call them "boobs" or "dollies"?!!! I am not ashamed to say breasts!). This made me think, "Oh well, there's always next cycle." but I've been on the Fertility Friend boards a lot and sooooo many people have been disheartened by loads of pre-periody cramping the week before they were due, and then got a positive pregnancy test. So hmmm. There really is just NO way of knowing until period-time is there?!!! How frustrating!! Hehe! But oh well.
I am trying to be positive. Not positive like I'm sure I'll be pregnant, but positive as in not complaining and stuff. I guess this is a challenge for me because I would say I have a tendency to be complainy. But here's what I've noticed over the last 6-12 months: I read a ton of pregnancy diaries, and many of them are reeeally complainy and moany. Of course some of them are having a rough time with pregnancy symptoms, but still, their diaries are becoming an annoyance/chore to read, which I think is a shame. It's such an amazing time of life and such an amazing miracle to be pregnant, or even to be healthy and blessed with a loving partner and therefore able to try to conceive! I also know pregnancy and TTC can be hard-going, but it's just that I am noticing I do not really enjoy reading those diaries that have become one big moan-fest entry after entry after entry. On the OTHER hand, a small handful of diaries are an absolute joy to read, and I find myself grinning when I see they've updated!! Robbi's pregnancy diary was like that. Stuff she says reminds me of how precious it all is, no matter how yucky or difficult at times, and she is so upbeat!! I want to be like that. So I'm gonna try. But here's my disclaimer that I think it will not come ALL that naturally!! But I'll try anyway! :) I want people to feel joyful and upbeat after reading my diary entries, especially when I am pregnant, because I know how nice that is from reading other people's diaries.
Anyway that was a bit of an aside!!
Ooh, congratulations Amberlee on your pregnancy!! And thanks for signing my guestbook! :)
Foooour days. Today is Thursday. I am due on Monday. So just Friday and the weekend to wait. I can't believe how fidgetty this last bit is getting! This weekend I am going to be kept busier than normal. I have a looong prayer thingy on Saturday, and then Sunday I am leading the youth group at church so that should keep me busy! Maybe Neil and I can go out somewhere on Sunday afternoon. Just sitting here today I am going crazy! It is helping to chat with others online who are also 4ish days to go from their period/test date. And there are TONS of us out there!!! I was so surprised there could be dozens and dozens of people on the exact same day past ovulation as me, all posting on a board together! It helps a lot, and actually it's great when they start posting pregnancy results, even if I am not pregnant. It gives me hope for next time.
I got my wool wrap in the post today!!! It is gorgeous, and soooo soft! It is newborn size for sure, maybe even a little larger, so it should get some good use from pretty early on. Anyway I am really pleased with it, since it only cost me stamps for postage and wool wraps are usually the most expensive thing you can buy in terms of diaper/nappy stuff. I also bought another size 0 kissaluv from the buy and sell forum at UKparents today. It's one of the coloured ones, peach/orange and unbleached. It's used but the great thing about buying size 0 kissaluvs is that they won't have been used like the size 1's, because they are grown out of so quickly. Anyway, it was only �2!!!!!!! So I am happy! :) I still plan to buy the full colour range of size 0 kissaluvs brand new as a "yippee!" present to myself when I get a positive pregnancy test. They are just so cute.
Well I have little else to say today, just couldn't resist an update. Maybe I'll update tomorrow too? My other diary is suffering from neglect but oh well. And so are emails right now I'm afraid. But I'll get back to it all soon. This is just a biggie for me right now.
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