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2004-02-24 - 12.14pm��previous entry��next entry
Update at 11 days past ovulation
Thanks for the birthday wishes!!! :)
Okay, I am still in France. And I'm now on CD25 and I'm 11 days past ovulation. Yikes! It's getting close to testy time, but I'm trying not to think about testing. The thing is, it's getting difficult because my chart is looking really good again. I shouldn't get sucked into charts looking a certain way, but hey ho, I'm human and broody.
I think my chart is triphasic again, but FF have not confirmed this, so maybe not. I thought triphasic was a third level of temperatures that start from between 7 and 10 days after ovulation (but most common around 7 or 8 apparantly), that are higher or EQUAL TO the highest temps of the previous week. Which would make my chart triphasic, but maybe FF doesn't think like that? I had a little dip at 9DPO which brought it back level with my highest previous temps, so maybe that is not what they call triphasic? But anyway, it went up after that, and up again today. Up-up-up, keep going up!!! If my chart is triphasic it started at 8DPO, right on time, and the same as last cycle when my chart went triphasic.
Anyway, enough about charts. I am generally much less stressy about things this cycle, which is weird, but nice! This morning when I took my temperature I was convinced I'd see a drop, so I was telling myself, "It's just a matter of time, you'll be pregnant eventually, think of the travel-sickness pill you can take on the plane on Friday" etc!! That helped, and then I was so surprised to see my highest temp yet this cycle! :)
I hope it stays up. I hope I'm pregnant. Otherwise there's obviously no point in my temp staying up. Obviously.
I am getting so excited about Judy and my lovely friend Deborah being due to give birth ANY TIME NOW!!!! Ooooh exciting!! I love births. Also, I notice I have not one tiny weeny trace of bad feeling where my pregnant friends are concerned now. That is so amazing, because no matter what, I couldn't seem to get rid of bad feeling about that before. I seem to have taken on a whole different mindset this cycle, and it's such a relief. Phew.
Well let's see, what else? I have been trying not to symptom-spot so far, but of course I am not that good at it!! I have had no nausea at all this cycle, and since I had a ton last time I was thinking maybe that's a bad sign :( But yesterday we had pizza (fresh dough from the bakery and we made our own sauce and toppings), and we had mushrooms and ham. Yum, I love mushrooms! But one tiny piece of ham made me feel like I might gag on it, so I gave the rest of my ham to Neil.
And I have had such an appetite while we've been here. Maybe that's nothing though. But yesterday I ate lunch and then everyone started on some seriously yummy cakes from the bakery, and I just did not want anything sweet. I was so hungry still! So boiled an egg and had that with mayonnaise and a ton of buttered bread. Weird. I am not hugely keen on sweet stuff the last couple of days, but I am taking that with a pinch of salt (no pun intended) because of how Deborah told me she hated sweet stuff when pregnant. So yeah, my subconscious probably thinks it's being really clever, going off sweet food. But ha, I have it sussed. I am not making anything of my sweet-food issue, so there subconscious!
The other thing is I am peeing more. Which IS encouraging!! Neil is rolling his eyes because every cycle I get new symptoms that COULD mean pregnancy, but always doesn't. My body is trying every trick in the book. Stupid body! But nice body, lovely body, because I rely on it to carry a baby to term :) Niiiice body, there there....
Yes, so I am not drinking enough, I need to drink more. I have had less than 1.5 litres every day, except one day when I made a bit more effort and drank 1.75 litres. And soup that day too. But every night I am getting up to pee (just once) and that isn't like me at all. When I lie down in bed my bladder feels sort of pressurey. For a couple of nights recently, I would pee right before getting into bed, and then before I could fall asleep I would need to get up and pee again. This is soooo unlike me that I started worrying that maybe I had a bladder infection or something. But I don't think I do. I don't have any symptoms, and I don't pee like crazy in the day (except that day where I drank a little more!). It just feels..... I can't describe it..... sort of under pressure, at night, even if I just peed. It's a lying-down thing. Odd.
I had another dream the night before last. Another one with Robbi in it!!! I don't know why she is popping up in my dreams. Maybe I see her as a wonderful mother and wish that I could be the same? Because I do really. So anyway, I had a little boy, about 10 months old with dark hair like me and Neil. Robbi and her husband came to see us and we went out to this little shed (!!) to watch a movie. They brought their seventh (!!!) child with them, a baby. Anyway, my little boy got fidgetty and I said I would take him outside as he didn't look too good. But my arms were too weak to pick him up. This is a horrible recurring dream for me, I have had it repeatedly for many years. I have a baby or toddler (never older, it's always one that relies on me to pick it up), and when I go to lift it, my arms go weak and I can't keep hold of the child. I am always soooo embarrassed and don't want anyone to see that I can't lift my child. It's always accompanied by a feeling of panic because I know if I don't immediately put them down I will drop them. I have dropped a lot of babies in my dreams!! They always land on their heads.
Anyway, I took my baby outside (with difficulty and much trying to hide the problem), and once we were outside he started throwing up, but really violently and he wouldn't stop. I was holding him round the tummy and could feel every heave so clearly. It made me panic, but not like I thought I would, with my fear of vomiting. Anyway I was trying to lean him forwards but my arms went weak and I dropped him on his head :( Then I realised he was Cameron. I don't know why. He got better so I took him indoors but he started throwing up again and I couldn't lift him. So weird. Very scary dream for some reason.
Anyway, what else can I tell you? I am still taking my baby aspirin every day, and I'm gonna stop that as soon as I see my temperature drop. I don't much fancy being on a blood thinner whilst having a period!
Next cycle I am going to drink a TON of water every day. I have 2 friends on my Control Freaks TTC (!!) buddy group, and they both said that amongst other things, they drank absolutely enormous quantities of water the month they finally conceived. I don't drink enough anyway, so it would be good for me. Also I will be that bit fitter next cycle, because I have been exercising for a bit now. I don't think we'll use egg white - well, I keep wavering on that one. I seemed to conceive last cycle using it, and this cycle we didn't use it (even thought we used Pre-Seed instead), so hmmm, if I am not pregnant this time, I will probably be thinking about that egg white for next cycle. Maybe. I will try to drink 2 cups of green tea per day instead of one, leading up to ovulation, and I am going to try baby carrots and whatever that other food/drink is that helps you produce more fertile CM. And BD every day again. I think that is a good idea.
My mum is fascinated with my chart! She looks at it saying, "What could make it go up like that?!" and I say I don't know, maybe pregnancy, but I honestly don't know why else my chart would be on a steady climb this cycle. Of course I have seen plenty of charts of mine that have looked promising in some way and came to nothing, so I am trying not to be excited about my chart. It might look good now, but it could plop tomorrow and stay lowish till the big plunge on the day of my period. So you can't tell. I hate waiting, every month I hate it, even when I am less stressy than usual! :)
Oh I forgot to say - I am really really crampy. Reeeally crampy. Especially in the morning when I wake up, and for the first few hours out of bed. I have been crampy since 7DPO, when I had a few cramps, but it really kicked in at 8DPO and has continued ever since. Except not every hour of the day or anything. Just a few hours on, a few hours off. Sort of like last cycle, but not quite the same feeling. I don't know if it means my period is coming or what, but it seems a bit early for me to have cramps all this time. Plus it ties in with my maybe-triphasic temps. Hmmm.
I am tired, but not anything special. My breasts have been hurting much LESS than normal, which is very weird, but they are pretty sore today. Fortunately I have the most comfy maternity bra ever invented (or so it seems!) which I won on eBay last week before we came to France. It's from Marks and Spencers, but I don't think they still make them the same. I don't remember seeing any like it when I tried maternity bras on a few months ago there. It's one cup, sorta like a sling. Sooo comfy. Anyway, maybe that has been helping them to be less sore this cycle? I don't know.
Well I think that's all my news, and my parents just got back from the market so I'm going to go now. I'll write again very soon!! No real urge to test yet, which is good :) I'll update later or tomorrow.
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