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2008-11-09 - 11:03 p.m.��previous entry��next entry
5 weeks, 5 days pregnant - well alrighty then!
It's late and I'm exhausted so I will try to keep this shortish! ;) Thanks so much for all the prayers and the lovely supportive messages! I appreciate them so very much!
I'm 5 weeks and 5 days pregnant today, and feeling MUCH better about everything! I am still having brown spotting, and it isn't really improving day by day, but at least it's just spotting, and just brown! I wish I could describe the weirdness that has been the COMPLETE change in my feeling about this pregnancy. I am actually amazed by it, it's such a different feeling. Up till I had the bleeding, I had the strongest sense that there was something wrong with the baby, and that it was not viable. I can't even describe it (though I did my best at the time), because it was such an overwhelming feeling. I was extra worried about it because I have had 3 healthy pregnancies and yet this is the first time I've ever had such a sense of foreboding about a pregnancy from the start. I was just absolutely SURE. And then when I was bleeding, well, after I had been bleeding say 8 hours or so, the feeling literally disappeared and hasn't returned! It's so strange. It was like a blanket before, and now completely gone.
Now, since I did not miscarry, and the bleeding has changed to spotting, and my temps are still up nicely, I am feeling really confident that the baby is fine, and the pregnancy is going to be okay. It's just weird to me how that feeling started while I was bleeding, when I should have felt at my LEAST confident, especially with how I'd been feeling before! Neil still holds on to his theory about twins, and one having been lost that was never going to make it. He thinks now that that one has been lost, naturally the sense of doom has lifted, as whatever connection I had that was making me feel that way is gone. And now I can see past it to feel the usual yayness of a healthy bean. Or something! Who knows. I guess a scan will (dis)prove that if I get one soon-ish.
Jeannie, I have heard of the theory your husband goes by! It's so funny to me that he does, because Neil has the same story! His mum bled heavily during the first trimester with him and had to go on bedrest. They didn't consider twins or have a way of checking (apparently) at the time, but he feels sure he's a survivor of twins because he's left-handed, like the theory (and it is one!) suggests! :)
Also! Guess what happened to yesterday?! At 5 weeks and FOUR days?! I wasn't expecting it till Monday (5w6d) but morning sickness deeefinitely started yesterday, yes. I was blessed with a GREAT lie-in yesterday morning till mid-morning or something heavenly like that, haha! And basically as soon as I got up I noticed my mouth was watering more than usual. Nothing much else. It continued doing so all day. I seemed to be distracted by it a lot, having to swallow more than usual and it being a bit not-so-nice. Also, I noticed that my saliva tasted a bit metallic. I don't remember metallic taste as one my pregnancy symptoms in the past, though I know it's a classic pregnancy symptom. I might just have forgotten though?
Anyway, the too-much-saliva thing continued all day and then I put the boys to bed, and I noticed I felt a little yeurghy while I was settling Arthur. Then I came downstairs (about 7.30pm) and realised it wasn't yeurghy, it was queasy. Which rapidly progressed to nauseous, because I didn't eat right away. By the time dinner was served, about an hour later, I felt really grim. I totally recognised it as morning sickness - it's getting more and more familiar each time! - and knew I just had to eat anyway. I felt a lot better for eating dinner, but another new thing was that I did NOT want to eat any dessert. Sweet food = urrrghhhh. Just thinking about it too much, even. Oh and also, from the start of the day yesterday, I was really struck by how strong smells seemed to me all of a sudden.
The sweet food aversion and the strong smells were all typical pregnancy symptoms for me before I tested positive with Arthur and Matthew! It might have been a touch later with Nathan, I can't remember, but I'm definitely not used to experiencing it this late.
Anyway so this morning (Arthur's birthday!!!) I felt okay when I got up. I felt okay for another hour maybe, and then noticed some smells were making me feel a little bit yucky. Sitting anywhere near my parents' fridge was AWFUL when they opened the door - smelly French cheese and various garlicky leftovers, etc!! It literally turned my stomach over, flip-flop, and I had to move instantly and try to distract myself from the instant nausea. Coffee also now bothers me muchly. And soap, and anything perfumed, and hot ovens, and print in new books, and anything sweet, and burnt toast, and pooey nappies, and bins, and nappies with just wee in them, and the usual - biting my fingernails. That turns my stomach so much - I recognised that one as pregnancy related straight away!
Today has been queasy-ish during the morning, and by about noon I was nauseated all the time. I finally remembered to EAT to fix it at about 1pm, and felt better for it. I then noticed that the nausea got quite a bit worse around 3pm so I ate another snack, which helped. It was back by 5.15pm so I snacked again. I felt grim after getting the boys to bed as it was more than 2.5 hours since I last snacked! So, it's already pretty clear to me that if I don't snack every 2 hours at the longest, I will feel dreadful as a result and it gets worse very quickly from there until I eat. That's helpful to know! ;) It's something I already know from previous pregnancies (whenever I finally figured it out!) but it's good to know that 2 hours is my limit this time. I do not care one jot about the calories. I hate nausea SO VERY MUCH that I will do just about anything to relieve it! Who cares about the snacky calories! And it's not like I'm eating sweet junk at ALL, so that's not so bad.
I've been having some ligament pains, but very mild (so far - they'll get worse as my womb gets bigger!), and that's reassuring too. Also, today and yesterday I've had some tenderness and stabbing pains in my breasts, which is pretty much the first time I've had any bother there so far this pregnancy. My milk is still going as usual, so far.
I'm peeing more, and today for the first time, when I lie on my back, the area directly above/behind my pubic bone does not cave in when I press it. There's some sort of resistance, so I know things are growing and moving up a little bit in there. I can always feel the top of my uterus by 8 weeks, so I know it seems crazy early to feel any sort of change from the outside at almost 6 weeks, but there's stuff to push up out of the way before the uterus gets to where I can feel it, and it's only a couple of weeks before that time, so it's feasible, to me. It's exciting!!!
Also, I haven't been checking embryology websites at all for a week or so, because of the strong feelings I've had and then the bleeding. But I wanted to catch up this evening, and when I checked, I discovered (to my amazement - this never gets old!) that Babydot's heart is already beating!!! How AMAZING is that?! I'm so full of joy to think about that :) I can't wait to see it beating on the ultrasound screen.
Tomorrow is Monday and so I'll be phoning my GP in the hope of speaking to her and then maybe she can set the ball in motion for me to have a scan soon, when we get home. I really hope I'll be able to speak to her. I'm not sure if they'll let me, or maybe she'll have to call back but they won't do international calls? Or maybe she's not in tomorrow? So, we'll see. I really hope it will be a good outcome from the phone call tomorrow though.
I think that's it! It's so late and I'm feeling wiped out today. Nathan is teething again (still no teeth!) and has spent half the evening screaming and being walked around the house, so while he's quiet and sleeping I'm going to bed! Hopefully he won't be too disturbed in the night! I'll update again soon!
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