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2007-10-01 - 10.01pm��previous entry��next entry
Frustration over names for the scan...
Just a P.S. to my earlier entry, but I had to write it because arrrrgh, we apparantly are NOT sorted for girls' names!!! It sooooooo bugs me! I know we have like half a whole pregnancy before the baby is actually born, and thus plenty of time to name the baby, etc, but I am just picky like that. I like to name the baby when we find out the gender! It drives me batty to think that we won't be able to do it because one of us hasn't taken advantage of the extremely generous notice that the other one of us gave, and thought about girls' names.
Neil knows that this is the way I (we, actually) like to do things with naming our babies and the scan, and I have been talking about getting names ready for the scan since like FIVE WEEKS PREGNANT or something crazy! I know we do have trouble agreeing on girls' names in general though - we always have, but we've never really had to deal with it, given that we've always had boys! Maybe we'll just have another boy and won't have to deal with it again? Neil is eager for his Nathan, I am thinking more so than for a girl, though he never says anything to indicate preference before we know the baby's gender. Mostly he doesn't seem to have preferences, but if he DOES, he only lets me know afterwards :)
Anyway, I know he wouldn't mind a little girl, because he said so this evening, but I also know he is eager for a little boy to name Nathan. It bugs me (for some irrational and probably hormonal reason!) because if I'm 100% honest, my preference is for a girl this time around. Not to the degree that I'd be gutted if the baby is a boy, at ALL, because I would love to have another boy. I think I would feel sad if we weren't having any more kids and I thought that I would have no more baby boys! I love having baby boys! But I would so like to have a daughter too at some point, and my absolutely perfect mental picture for my family is two little boys followed by a girl (and then another girl and another boy, or boy then girl, but let's not go that far down that wistful pathway, eh?!). If I had five kids (I've thought about this for some years!), I would love to have 3 boys and 2 girls. Never mind the order, but with two boys first, my picture-perfect scenario would be for a girl after those two boys. But anyway. It doesn't really matter. Our family will always feel perfect to me, no matter how many children and what order they come in! I know I'll be glad of how it worked out, whatever happens, when I have my little ones around me and I'm just so grateful that they're here and that they're WHO THEY ARE.
Anyway.
But the name thing is driving me crazy! Just as a quick by-the-by this evening, I casually asked Neil if we were still set for baby names for tomorrow (as we were when I lasted checked with him), and he said he's decided he doesn't like Georgia any more!! Now, of course that is FINE if he doesn't like a name that I like. I will have to get over that, it's fine. But the night before?! When I told him if he doesn't like the only name left on our shortlist that HE has to come up with some others, otherwise we'll only have that one to take with us to the scan?!!?! Ugh, I'm so annoyed with him. I'm really hormonal and moody today so I'm sure I'm reacting extra irrationally, but hmph all the same!
I explained (calmly and rationally, honest!) what he already knows, that I have always wanted to name the baby when we find out the gender (for the reasons I think I outlined recently here), and that I will feel really disappointed if we can't do that tomorrow, and he just got stroppy and said he didn't need that kind of pressure, and there was no way he could come up with names that I will like by the scan (right now he is playing poker online, which extra hugely bugs me - he's just being a MAN and has no idea how important this is to me - yes, yes, I can SEE how much I'm over-reacting, but who cares: Have diary, will vent!).
Pfthth. So I don't know. I have gone back to the shortlist and decided to take my own mental shortlist to the scan for girls' names in the hope that if he sees the baby (and it's a girl) and he likes ONE of the names on the shortlist, he'll be happy to pick one because he can apply it to the baby he can actually see at that moment, and thus be happy with his decision. I also want to add that I was always open-minded to the possibility that we'd decide we would call the baby Georgia and then see her at the scan and just KNOW that she didn't look like a Georgia. Then, I'm not sure what we'd have done next! But a shortlist is a GOOD idea.
I'm taking Georgia (even if it's a no-go!), Grace (because I love it), and Emma and Hannah, even though we had recently put those ones off the list because they didn't quite "do" it for us. I honestly can't find any other names that I like better, whether or not Neil might go for them. I've interrupted his poker game just now to tell him quickly that I'm taking those three other names with me to the scan. He said, "Okay" but in a non-committal way, so who knows what will happen. I'm so annoyed!!!! Whether it's right or wrong, I'm just so annoyed with him. It's not his fault that he doesn't like Georgia, and we HAVE got plenty of time, but still. He's had for EVER to think about it, and crazy or not, it DOES mean so much to me. Tsk.
Obviously I don't want to name our potential daughter on the spur of the moment, just for the sake of naming her THAT VERY DAY or anything. That would be silly! But I KNOW us. We'll have a girl, and she'll have no name tomorrow. Then, in a week or so, Neil will finally come up with a name that seems to fit and I think is okay. So we'll go, "That's the name!" and start using it when referring to the baby. THEN after a few weeks, we'll undoubtedly realise it's NOT the name, and that will be horrible to have to detach a name from the baby that has almost become part of her because of how we've used it as such until then, and start from scratch. I hate that idea! That's pretty much the main reason I like to name my babies when we find out if they're a girl or a boy! Also for bonding purposes, which is important to me too. Neil thinks he can read a baby names book on the train to work for a couple of weeks and come up with something.
A) He will not do this.
B) If he does, it won't get done in just a couple of weeks.
C) He will not find a name. We have combed (and I do mean combed) through a database with 19,000 names on it! We have seen and considered ALL the girls' names there are to see and consider, and the result is our shortlist. There are no. more. names.
D) I'm so annoyed! ;)
Well. I seem to remember an entry like the night before Matthew's scan, all about having FINALLY settled on a girl's name (Emma) and then of course he was a boy and it was irrelevant! So exactly the same thing could happen tomorrow and all this waffle and annoyance could be absolutely trivial and obsolete 24 hours from now! Entirely possible. But if this baby IS a girl, I just hope we both look at her sweet grainy image and our hearts melt and we just KNOW one of those names is perfect for her, and agree on it. I'm really praying for that tonight!
End rant. And now I shall get ready for bed. I will update tomorrow, but possibly not with a name if the baby is a girl. *sigh*
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