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2008-11-22 - 10.14pm��previous entry��next entry
7 weeks, 4 days - queazle, and uterus! Yay!
I'm past my half-week mark again! It's going so quickly. Every pregnancy seems to somehow go faster than the one before, and actually that's how LIFE goes, with one more baby each time. I hope it doesn't rush by too fast! I really love being pregnant (though I'm NOT enjoying the nausea right now!) and want to cherish every moment.
Well, Babydot is now 1cm long and almost as wide, because he/she is all curled up and the head is bent right over still. So tiny! But so much complex development has taken place already, it's amazing.
This morning (last night too, actually), I can feel the top of my uterus!!! I know, I'm only 7.5 weeks pregnant, and I must be crazy, blah blah, BUT I can always feel the top of my womb by 8 weeks. I either have a shallow pelvis or a tall womb, haha! It's always a weird "long" shape early on, not as rounded as later on, so I do feel the top of it early. I don't know if that's anywhere approaching normal (!) but it's certainly normal for me. So I'm really excited to be able to lay my hand on Babydot's actual little home! I feel so friendly towards my womb, haha! I feel fond of IT, not just the baby inside. It's like, "Hello old friend!" when I lay my hand on it for the first time in 10 or 11 months, hehe! Seriously, I heart my womb. It's probably my favourite organ ;)
It's about an inch or so above my pubic bone. I have been feeling a sort of resistance that's rounded right above my pubic bone for a week or so, but this is different, it's the familiar smooth, very firm, rounded wall of what I know to be my sweet lil uterus growing again with another precious baby inside it! It's still set behind my pubic bone, so to speak, so it's not sticking out like a baby bump or anything. I have to push in a little to feel it.
With this new excitement about it being palpable has come the insane urge to crack out my doppler! *sigh* Even though it's WAY too early, there I was on the sofa this morning with my doppler :) Of course, I didn't hear Babydot, although I'm hoping to anywhere from a week from now (getting so close!!!), by which time Babydot will be approaching the 13 or so millimetres that my other babies have measured when I was first able to hear their hearts beating with a doppler (is that not MIND-BLOWING?!?!). But I did hear some very strong placenta sounds - already?? I know the placenta is developing all the time, so I didn't know how soon it's possible to hear it whooshing. I'm really encouraged by the fact that my uterus is growing, and my placenta is whooshing away strongly. That must mean Babydot is doing okay, mustn't it?
I was really nervous in the first half of the week, because my morning sickness seemed to be improving every day, and way more manageable than any of my previous pregnancies at that stage. Which was either worrying or weird, because the week before it was the WORST morning sickness I'd had, and then suddenly the opposite! I worried that something was up with Babydot because I've always had morning sickness that just sits there horribly, not moving at all till it finally passes off in my 2nd trimester. It didn't really ebb and flow with my other pregnancies, except that it did have patches where it seemed worse than ever, and then back to normal again. This time, even evenings were okay-ish, which felt a bit nerve-wracking to me!
My spotting has continued till yesterday. I really haven't had any today (yet), which is the first day. It got lighter during the week and then darker again on Thursday and Friday, but it's apparently gone today. If I get any more, I'm almost beginning to hope it'll hang around till Wednesday now, because if it does I can phone to book another scan, and those are really so reassuring when I'm having bleeding of any sort. I love seeing Babydot as well! But if the spotting really IS gone, then YAY! I feel a bit pessimistic about it - I know I shouldn't, but it's just the way things have been for me over my pregnancies. I just feel like I don't want to be too optimistic about it, because likely I'll bleed or spot again yet. I know that's so negative of me, but I can't seem to shake it, or let myself relax about it. I'm trying though! It's horrible to discover bleeding, and I guess this way I'm "protecting" myself, being prepared to see it at any time.
Well, yesterday (Friday) and today I have felt much more sick, so I guess that's reassuring too! I don't know why it was so much better. At first I thought it was to do with my coping methods (eating and such), but then I remembered that I tried the same stuff my last two pregnancies and it didn't make much difference to the fact that I still felt horrible in the evenings. Also, I've been doing the same these last two days and it's just been so much worse anyway. I really prefer the better days, lol! I just don't like being nauseous all the time at ALL. Thankfully the time is going quickly, and I think that's my best help!
All the things that were helping me earlier in the week are now GROSS and I can't even think about them! I don't remember if it was the same way with my other pregnancies, but it seems the way this time. It's harder because I have to keep finding new things to eat or drink every few days! It was so much easier the other times when I could just eat cottage cheese sandwiches or cottage cheese on baked potato or whatever, day in, day out for 3 months till it passed, haha! Not this time. The main problem is fluids, again. I've gone right off the This Water drinks and can hardly bear sipping milk or water, and so I have NOTHING that I can bear to drink. I'm drinking so little that it's silly of me, and started to feel dehydrated a lot. I have had a huge drop in milk supply and am now really constipated too, ugh. I know I need to just guzzle down a lot of lovely fluids and all will be well, but I can't explain it - I just CAN'T put drinks down my throat and into my stomach! It's just the most horrible feeling in my stomach and I feel so sick after only a few sips of anything, for ages. I'm trying to drink more water at times of day when I feel a little less sick from it, but there aren't really many (any?) of those times so far. I'm managing to take my prenatal vitamin before bed every night though.
I'm also having heartburn for most of the day and night these last few days. I have been having heartburn here and there before then too, but it's nothing unbearable. I haven't taken anything for it yet (because, yucko), and it's bearable.
I am also having lots of ligament pains lately, and they're getting to be quite painful now! The first tiny ones around test time were soooo faint! And now they're sore enough to make me have to breathe through them till they pass. It's only really when I get up fast at the same time as twisting slightly, or lean over at an awkward angle or something. Just the normal stuff. I like ligament pains, even though they're painful! :) They always remind me that those ligaments are under more strain because they're supporting what must be a much bigger uterus than before, and that thought always makes me smile, you know, as I'm trying to breathe through a searing ligament pain! ;)
Umm.... I can't think what else. I am a bit crampy today, and I'm weeing plenty even without having enough fluids. I'm beginning to feel a bit uncomfy and full in my pelvis, even this early. I know it'll get more so as the weeks go by, till my uterus is ready to pop out of there!
I forgot to start a Belly Gallery! I can't believe it! Although, I did remember just before it hit 5 weeks (which is when I usually take my first belly pic for the gallery), but the day I turned 5 weeks, we travelled to France, and then things were all up in the air with the bleeding for a bit. Once we got home I felt so sick, and I'm so behind on uploading photos anyway (have just TODAY uploaded the photo of my last pregnancy test, lol!), so I didn't see much point in the end. I must take one soon though, otherwise we'll be at 10 weeks already without a "before" photo to compare it to! I always have a little rounded something by 10 weeks, so it would be nice to have a "before" shot, but oh well. My belly was basically the same as the last two belly galleries at 5 weeks, so there you go.
Lots of people are starting to say they feel that Babydot is a girl now. I don't know if that's at all influenced by the fact that I already have 3 boys? I mean, for some people they are basically thinking, "Surely you can't have ANOTHER boy?! Surely THIS time it's a girl!!" so that is the reason they think it's a girl! But I just don't know what to think. I'm trying not to think about it at all actually! I felt so strongly when Nathan was just newly born that my next baby would be another boy. I felt like God himself was telling me so, and that his name would be Benjamin. Well, it's all too easy now that I'm pregnant to second guess myself and to let wondering start happening! If I let wondering start happening, then DESPITE the fact that I will be so overjoyed and thrilled if Babydot is a boy, I will probably start to think how nice it might be to have a daughter for the FIRST TIME! And then thinking like that will probably turn into a mild form of hope, and then I'm in trouble. Because probably, God really did tell me that this baby will be a boy, and there I went and let myself go down a path of thinking away from what he (might have) told me, and ended up desiring what he didn't intend, and feeling slightly disappointed over something he always intended for me, to be a complete joy and a blessing! I know that's an over-complicated way of looking at it, but there is the reason why I'm trying not to think about it! ;)
The truth is, I really really really WILL be so excited and thrilled if Babydot is a boy. I'm expecting him to be, although can't quite bring myself to write "him" like that for some reason! I guess I'm doubting myself a bit, that I did hear God. And I really might have been wrong about that! But anyway. We'll see. If Babydot turns out to be a girl after all, I will not know what to DO with myself for excitement and disbelief and joy. I DO want to have a daughter, and it's something I've never done, so if it's a girl then I will have the joy of having the daughter I would love to have, and also the thrill of doing something amazing for the very first time! I've never been a girl-mummy! But, I am a seasoned boy-mummy, and I love it completely! :) Another sweet boy would be bliss, to me. It gets easier each pregnancy, strangely enough. I feel that if I only ever birth boys, perhaps God will allow me to adopt my daughters one day? So that's okay by me! I rejoice in every child he blesses us with, no more or no less depending on their gender! It's all such a thrill and a blessing and a joy!!! :D
Okay, I should go to bed. I went to bed at 9pm one day this week!!! And felt no less tired for it the next day, but I'm so glad I did because I probably would have felt wrung out that day otherwise! Nathan is wakeful at night at the moment, and working (hard) on standing alone all day long, so I think that's what the wakings are about. Not fun for me! But understandable, and hopefully short-lived!! I'll update again soon! Thanks for the guestbook messages and Kaitlyn for the note! :)
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