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2009-07-06 - 10.45pm��previous entry��next entry
39 weeks, 5 days - nearly there!
My due date is just the day after tomorrow!!! Sooooo close now. I really can't believe I'm here, this pregnant, honestly. It's so surreal to me a lot of the time. It has gone so fast!
I know I said I would update the next day after my last entry, and maybe even get to daily entries! I would love to have been doing that! But I'm too long-winded for my own good and so I don't really leave myself enough time to write like I want to here before it's time for bed. Also we have annoyingly left soooo much till the last minute to get "done", so that's taking up a lot of my time where I would otherwise be relaxing and waiting for the baby, and updating here more probably! I'm frustrated about that, but what can you do?
So, I did not go into labour after my last post, obviously! ;)
I woke up the next morning with a TOTALLY quiet feeling in my womb! I had barely any Braxton Hicks contractions all that day, and everything felt very calm. Benjamin moved about as normal. The only thing that was different was the continued low back pain and low pressure/pelvic discomfort when walking about. I am guessing Benjamin dropped lower into my pelvis, but I can't be sure he's stayed there since then! They say babies can pop back up again even once they're engaged, especially in women who have had babies before (the more babies she's had, the more likely it is). But I have definitely been much more uncomfortable since then. It's harder to find any comfy position to sit in or lie in any more. It hurts more than it used to when Benjamin moves his head or limbs, or wiggles about in there. Neil says I am definitely looking bigger this week than last week, urrrgh! That boy is still growing in there! I hope he comes out soon. Even though I don't feel "ready" as such, I am getting to feel so ready to meet him and have all this anticipation cut short and over and done with now.
I weighed myself for 39 weeks and was surprised to see that I've gained rather a lot since I weighed myself at 37 weeks! :S At 37 weeks I wrote here that I was surprised to have only gained about 42/43lbs in total, because I usually gain 55lbs by the end of my pregnancies (except I don't know what that would have been with Nathan, since he was early, but I was on track for the same weight gain as the older boys earlier in my pregnancy with him). So I thought maybe I would not be gaining as much weight this time. Wrong, haha! ;) At 39 weeks I have (had - it was a few days ago!) gained 50lbs! Seven or eight pounds in a couple of weeks. So I'm thinking I MUST be nearly there, and will probably (uncannily!) end up weighing EXACTLY what I have weighed at the end of my pregnancies with Arthur and Matthew (Arthur - 54lbs gained; Matthew - 55lbs gained, but Matthew arrived 3 days later than Arthur, gestationally speaking) - isn't that crazy?! It's so weird how it's so exact! I should weigh myself in the morning and see if I've gained another 4 or 5 lbs yet, maybe that will give me the best indication of whether labour is imminent or not?! ;) Only 2lbs gained = baby probably not arriving in the next day or so, hehe! Gotta pack on those extra few lbs in order to call the pregnancy COMPLETE and be able to give birth! ;)
Also Jemma pointed out to me that there's a full moon, the other day, and I looked it up on Google, to discover that the full moon occurs this month TOMORROW (Tuesday) at 9.32am (GMT) or something like that. So, full moon tonight! Now, I know there is a definite correlation between full moons and pregnant women going into labour, and the Supervisor of Midwives was even talking about it for a while with Heather and me while the midwife did my antenatal check last week, but I looked up the past full moon dates and I have NEVER had a baby on a full moon before, even when they were due (or not!). So, maybe it won't affect me at all. But I'm really hoping it somehow does!
So anyway, Saturday was a very quiet day for my uterus, and then Sunday turned out very much the same. I did lose some SMALL bits of my mucus plug on Saturday morning, after the day of contractions on Friday, but that's all that happened, and I'm not paying too much attention to that. If they were bigger pieces or blood-stained (like my doula excitedly asked over the phone, hehe! I told her I'd lost some bits of mucus plug and she said, "Bloody?!!" in such an excited voice, hehe! She has warned me that she's "nutty" about birth! ;) ) then I would have updated here right away and been more interested in what might happen as a result. I think maybe the contractions on Friday might have resulted in me being a tiny bit more dilated by Saturday, hence a little loss of mucus plug. Probably. I'm kind of hoping that might make me 2 or 3cm dilated already, even without being in labour yet! I know I was a good 1-2cm many weeks ago without a baby low in my pelvis or contractions. Things tend to go fast for me after 3cm, so I'm wondering that if I DO end up 3cm dilated before labour even starts (which I never have before), it might be quite a quick labour this time? As always I'm really eager to check for myself, but I won't be doing that again this pregnancy, now that I know I'm definitely GBS positive. I also won't be allowing any internal examinations or a cervical sweep for the same reason. There's added risk with internals when you're GBS positive.
So today is Monday (or has been!), and it's been another quiet day in Benjamin's little world. He hasn't been so wiggly today, but he has moved about now and then throughout the day, so I am not too worried. He seems quiet or sleepy when he moves about, not vigorous like usual. I hope he's just growing again (sort of!) or that he's just having a quieter day, and not that he's having any sort of trouble in there at this late stage. It's so easy to worry about the slightest thing when pregnant and hormonal! Especially when you're nearly there! This evening I have had a bunch of Braxton Hicks that have felt quite strong - coming every 2 or 3 minutes while Neil and I were chatting after the boys were in bed, but they didn't really continue after ate dinner and got up and walked about. Right now I feel like there is a lot of pressure in my butt, or thereabouts, and it's quite uncomfortable. It also feels pinchy and achy low down in front at the same time. It's just THERE, it doesn't come and go.
I'm wondering if I might have a couple of new stretch marks. I'm actually not sure and probably can't ever know if I have or not, since I have so many already! They're not huge or red or anything, but they're quite plentiful! I don't mind them at all. They remind me of being pregnant and make me think of my sweet babies, so I love them! :) Now the ones behind my thighs do NOT make me feel mushy or tender-hearted at all, so I strongly dislike those ones! ;) I don't think those are any worse this pregnancy (yet!), but all my stretch marks everywhere are stretched out fully now, except for the ones on my hips from Arthur. It's weird how those have never been fully stretched out with any of my subsequent pregnancies, but I got new ones on the front of my bump with Matthew that were never there with Arthur, and those have been the ones stretched out and added to with the pregnancies after Matthew.
Neil has been off work today, using up a day of holiday time. We haven't got much done at ALL over the 3-day weekend, which is endlessly frustrating, but oh well! The boys have been out for long walks with Neil and that's important since they don't get to do that with me any more. Also we went to a family birthday bash yesterday - my grandfather's 84th birthday! That was really nice. I wasn't sure if I would be up to going, but I was, and it was good fun. Bennie and Sarah were there (my brother) and so Thea was too, and the little ones had so much fun in my grandparents' BIG garden playing together and running about squealing! Including Thea, the great-grandchildren are aged 4, 3, 2 and 1, with another nearly born! :) When I look at it like that, I can't believe all but one of those are MINE! Yikes! I remember last year at the same birthday bash where the little ones were 3, 2, 1 and 6 months, and I commented that there has been a new baby at Grandoug's birthday bash every year for a while now, and I wondered aloud whether there would be another one next year. I remember there was some eye-rolling and also a rather tight-lipped comment from Granny about waiting a while this time, or something like that! Well, we ALMOST had a new baby again this year, but not quite! ;) Next year the little ones will be 5, 4, 3, 2, and nearly 1. I wonder if there'll be a new baby, or one on the way?? Not necessarily me, I mean - I know Bennie and Sarah are not planning to only have one child. I love seeing lots of little ones playing together! They all had so much fun yesterday, and I was able to sit and relax in the garden a lot while my wonderful brother played races and flying and all sorts of energetic things with my little boys (whose own Mummy and Daddy seem to be too exhausted for such things lately, so it was very nice for them!).
Last night when I went to bed, I felt SO calm and at peace in my uterus that I could honestly say for sure that I would not be going into labour that night. I know things can change, but I really thought I would be amazed to wake up contracting. And I didn't! ;) Today has been quiet as well, except for the increased BHs this evening, but I still don't feel particularly pre-labourish tonight.
Heather phoned me this morning to say that her back-up doula has had a car accident and has whiplash, so she can't back-up for her until at least next weekend. She has searched out another back-up and wanted to tell me about it. She has FIVE ladies due in July! Three are friends from church, and not hiring her as such, so they are lower priority. But there is a lady due the day before me (tomorrow!) who is having her first baby, and she booked Heather before I did, so she has first priority. I have second priority, so that's pretty good, but I feel a little bit unsettled about it now that I'm this close to giving birth and have built up a relationship with Heather. I don't want to have to have a back-up doula if Heather is called to the lady who booked her first! It bothers me now. Heather said that she received a text from her first lady this morning to say she had been having twinges and contractions through the night. It's her first baby and so she might have this go on for a while (or not), and labour might take quite a long time all in all (or not?), so I'm a bit nervous now about going into labour while Heather is with this other lady who might be taking her time :S I really want to get a call from Heather to tell me the other lady has had her baby, and then I know I have moved up to first priority and nothing will get in the way of her being with me. I never thought it would bother me this much, and Heather assured me that it's SO unlikely that we'll both need her for labour at the same time, right back when I hired her. But now we've got to the stage where both our due dates are in the next day or two and we neither of us have given birth yet, the likelihood is increasing day by day that we'll both call Heather at the same time :( I don't know what I want - to hold off and wait, and hope that the other lady is done by the weekend (though I REALLY don't want to still be waiting by the weekend!), or hurry up and go into labour and get my quick-labour thing going on and done with before the other lady calls Heather! It's extra stress that I don't need, and more so with the back-up doula changing and being someone who I haven't met and who isn't a Christian (I REALLY hope to have the benefit of a doula who will pray with me throughout my labour like Heather plans to).
Tomorrow Neil is going back to work and I'm stressing somewhat about how to manage the days this week. I don't seem to be able to do a THING for the boys lately, and even when I put in a ton of effort, I'm completely depleted after about an hour, or 90 minutes at best. I had the luxury of a 2.5 hour nap this afternoon because Neil was home and I was just so exhausted from my busy day of doing, uh, NOTHING. Every single day for the past couple of weeks I have felt like my body is begging me draggingly for a nap in the afternoon, and I'm sure I should be listening to it and doing as it says, because it's obviously what I need as I prepare for giving birth. But I can't, with little ones to care for and keep busy. It's so helpful when Neil is home because then I CAN listen to my body and do as it's telling me, and that makes me feel so much less nervous tension inside, because I feel like I'm better prepared for giving birth if I'm able to do what my body is telling me to. If I am prevented then I continually feel the pull and that makes it a distracting insecure feeling, knowing that I NEED to rest but can't, and wondering what effect that will have on me, not following what my body is telling me that I need to do to be ready to give birth. Urgh.
So I have no idea how I will manage tomorrow, but Heather says I just have to take it half a day at a time, or something like that. I feel bad for the boys being bored and restless because Mummy is lying on the sofa half the day unable to do anything fun or useful :( But I know it's just for a little while longer, and then Neil will be home and family will visit (I hope) and eventually we'll get into a routine and I'll recover and things will get more fun and active for them again. I hope they will not behave too awfully this week. It has been pretty bad lately. I don't really blame them though. They're bored right now, understandably! It's gone very rainy (for which I am eternally grateful!! So much nicer (to me, anyway!) than all the hot sunshine we've been having, and wonderfully fresh too! Not to mention the gorgeous smell!) so it's less easy to just let them run in the garden, but I can put them in waterproofs and welly boots if I need to. At least I don't have to slather what feels like hundreds of reluctant small people in suncream! :)
Well it's getting late and I need to go to bed. I'm so tired today. Oh! I must upload the 39 week belly picture! Tsk. I will try to remember next time.
We did manage to get 4 more boxes from my bedroom taped, labelled and up into the loft today, and I took Matthew's toddler bed apart (sniffle) and Neil put that in the loft too, so there's more space in the bedroom now. Sadly it's still all covered in clutter (which had been piled on the toddler bed or boxes) and I NEED to sort that out before having a baby in this room! But at least it's a start, hey? And we washed the newborn cloth nappies today. I changed Matthew and Nathan's sheets. And put in a complaint about the steam cleaning we had done for our living room carpet a week or two ago (soooo not clean, and stinky to boot!) - they're coming to re-do it on Friday. I hope that won't be hugely inconvenient, birth-wise! :S I do NOT fancy giving birth on a damp living room carpet that stinks horribly!
Okay, definitely going to bed. Will keep updating here with any developments. It can't be long now! I'm getting so excited to meet my newest baby boy! It just NEVER gets old! :)
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