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2004-06-28 - 7.06pm��previous entry��next entry
21 weeks, 3 days - Bean's patterns
Three days to go!!!! I can�t wait to see Bean!!!
Not much to report today. Bean is having another extremely active day � maybe this is the norm from now on? A clear pattern is starting to emerge, because for the last week or so, I have noticed several very active patches amongst the quiet bits. Every morning Bean wakes up and kicks right after I do, usually within the first minute or two that I am awake. If I wake for a pee at 5 or 6am and don�t fall back to sleep within a few minutes of getting back in bed, Bean wakes up then as well. But if I then go back to sleep for another few hours, Bean seems to be all quiet again by the time I wake, and wakes up and kicks within a couple of minutes of me waking again. Then it�s usually completely quiet in there from late morning through to mid-afternoon, and at around 3 or 4pm every day Bean wakes up and has a crazy kicking session for quite a good long patch, usually at least 30 minutes. Then I get the occasional bump or nudge throughout the afternoon and evening is quiet until bedtime, which is the time for another big kick fest!
This afternoon Bean has been extra busy, because I had the normal active time around 3pm and then in the last 20 minutes (it�s 6.30pm) Bean has had another big thumpy stompy session! I love feeling Bean kick and move around. There�s just nothing like it, and I feel so close to him/her when I can put my hand on my tummy and feel little parts of my baby hitting out against it. The different kicks and thumps feel quite different depending on which part of Bean is hitting out. I wish I could tell what my baby was doing to make that feeling against my hand, but I can�t really tell which part is which yet. I can tell a foot from a hand, but sometimes there are like 4 hands, which is obviously impossible (!!), so I am curious to know whether I am also feeling elbows or other pokey bits. Sometimes I get a movement that feels like a hard flick, and I know it�ll sound crazy but when I feel those movements I can almost hear a click sound. I can�t for the life of me figure what could be making that movement! But something is. Bean is certainly very active!
I am putting on weight still. I have now gained about 15lbs from the start of pregnancy, and the last couple of days we have begun to notice I am starting to look a little more weighty in parts. This is definitely giving us more of a girl vibe, but then that�s just old wives tales so who knows. My face has changed a little, it looks slightly more rounded and softer round the sides, so I know I�ve gained a little weight on my face lately. And Neil says my knees were looking slightly, um, chubbier! When I looked too, I saw that he was right. My thighs are also a bit bigger, and I�ve noticed the legs on one or two of my maternity shorts are a little tight on the thigh. Yeurgh. I am determined not to freak out about weight gain in pregnancy, but I still don�t like the idea of looking chubby or anything. I was kind of chubby at the start of puberty and it soooo did not look good on me at all, not even a little bit. My face does not suit a more rounded shape. But anyway, maybe this all means it�s a girl? My mum is getting more curious about this because of how she carried and gained weight with me and my brother. And how we�re so alike. Anyway we will see in 3 days!!!
Anyone want to take a guess at whether Bean is a girl or a boy?! I have been waffling on about it for months and saying I think this, or I think that, based on various different hunches and old wives tales and the last scan, etc, but I am curious to know what you guys think. Do you think I am having a little boy? Or a girl-bean?!
I forgot to say yesterday that when I was at the church picnic, I was talking to this lady (Sue) about Katie (who I don�t have an update on yet), and I can�t remember how it came up, but she said something about when it�s me in hospital giving birth, and I said, �Oh we�re having a homebirth� I felt really proud of myself because it�s the first time I�ve confidently said, �We�re HAVING a homebirth� and not, �hoping for� or �planning�. Of course if there are complications later on then maybe I won�t get to have my homebirth, but it�s definitely my plan. Anyway Sue was really weird about it. She did this really negative tone and that sideways look that says, �Now now dear, I don�t think you�ve thought this through� Tsk. But I was just in such a great mood and feeling so good physically, and I felt so confident in myself about my pregnancy and about the birth, that I was in a great position to stand up for myself. She said, �Ohhh (said in negative tone), why would you want to do THAT, with the first baby?� as if I was making a terribly irresponsible decision as a parent.
Well I just said, �It�s the best thing� to which she agreed but argued that she heard it�s a bad idea for the first baby. I said my GP said that too and maybe they would say that in the old days but times have changed. And my midwife completely agrees with me (ha!). Also I threw in my experience from my midwifery training for good measure and said I had seen enough and knew exactly what would be best for me and my baby. Man I felt good when that seemed to put an end to the conversation!! :) I just need to have that exact same mood/brain-to-speech co-ordination (!!) for all the other annoying conversations that I�m SURE I�ll have eventually. I�m sure there will be conversations about cloth nappies yet. And when I wear my baby in a sling all the time. And I�m kind of dreading the co-sleeping conversations. I�d almost rather nobody got to find out how me and my husband and child choose to sleep at night, because then we don�t have to have conversations with people where they try to judge, put down, and argue with us over the responsibility/safety of our choice. But I�m sure it�ll come up at some point. So far I am able to skirt questions like, �So have you got the baby�s room ready yet?� I just say, er, we�re not quite ready yet, or something like that. Which is true. But eventually it�s gonna come out that we�re not having a �baby�s room�, and blah, I�m really not looking forward to the conversations arising from that. People. They can be so annoying! ;)
I am feeling really good and second-trimestery today!! It�s so nice to feel blooming and healthy at last. Today I have put 2 laundry loads out on the line (warm weather today), taken some parcels and letters to the post office and stood in a VERY long and hot queue for ages, and started to clean up the living room. I am having more trouble reaching my feet these days. It�s not that my bump is enormous, but I just can�t seem to reach over it too well, not right down to my feet like I used to. Even if I bend my legs so my feet come up to meet my arms instead, I still find it hard to reach around my bump. It�s like my back won�t fold where it used to or something. Also I am having noticeable difficulty getting up when I have been sitting on the floor! I have to scrabble about till I�m on all fours and then get up from there. Again it feels like my bump is getting in the way of me doing a quick stomach crunch to get myself up, so I have to find other ways. When I do get up from the floor, my legs are not doing too great at forcing my body weight into an upright position! It�s weird. I guess it�s because I weigh so much more and my legs aren�t used to it? Or something. Or maybe they are just getting waaaay unfit. I can�t wait till I get the all clear (presuming I will) on my cervix at the scan so that I can get stuck into some swimming and walking now that I�m feeling better. I think that will help my chubby bits (!!) and also the all-important (and non-existant) fitness! I am also getting worried about my arms and how on EARTH they�re going to be happy holding even a 7lb baby for hours at a time after Bean is born. I want to hold my baby all the time, not lay it for hours in a cradle or carseat. But right now my arms will simply not take it. They are achy and weak from carrying parcels to the post office, and I�m sure a baby weighs more than what I carried today!
Okay Neil is about to get home from work so I�m going now. Please tell me what you think about Bean�s gender! I am so curious in this lead-up to finding out!
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