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2004-10-05 - 10.27am��previous entry��next entry
35 weeks, 4 days - interesting evening...
Thank you Mo for the guestbook entries!! :) Can you believe today is October 5th, so there is exactly one month to go until my due date!!! I can hardly believe we're this close!
Interesting evening last night. We had a roast dinner (mmmm!) and I was feeling kind of gaggy before we ate because I seem to have so much more pressure on my stomach at the moment. Sometimes I feel queasy and like gagging with it, but usually it's just uncomfortable. Arthur's bottom is sitting on it (quite literally!)! I'm just thankful it's his bottom and not his feet! Anyway, if I get antsy about eating we usually watch something on TV while we eat, to distract me. So we put on an old Star Trek episode and watched that - actually we watched two in a row, so that was like the length of a movie.
Somewhere around halfway through the second one, I began to be a bit more aware that I was getting Braxton Hicks contractions (which I often do anyway). Eventually they were distracting me though, even through a very attention-grabbing TV show. Every time one seemed to ease off, it seemed like no time before another one started, and I got really distracted once I noticed I had had five or six like this in a row. They weren't painful, just very tight and uncomfortable like normal. I didn't mention it to Neil, I just started to time them by the clock. We finished watching TV about 15 minutes later, and then I told Neil I seemed to be having a lot of BH contractions. It was late by then though, after 10pm.
It was so weird. I'm glad it happened because it was good practise. I had contractions 3 minutes apart for over an hour. It was so weird how you could feel one starting so clearly, glance at the clock and see 3 minutes since the last one started, almost every time. Weird how my body was so regular and like clockwork. It didn't seem to matter if I rested, drank water, went for a pee 3 times (!!), walked about, etc. They just kept coming anyway. They lasted almost exactly one minute every time, and they did start to get more and more painful. They never got really bad though. Just more like period pains. I started to feel like a burny achy feeling in my lower back as well, and when I had a contraction it would feel like a band of burning cramp around my hip level. The whole of my bump would go hard though. Arthur kicked and squirmed quite a bit between contractions. I did start to feel nervous - although I never expected to be in real labour. I pretty much knew it had to be false labour, even though all the books/websites say if contractions are coming every 5 minutes, lasting one minute, and for one hour in a row, or are regular and increasing in intensity, you should call your midwife. Mine matched all those criteria, but I had no intention of doing anything about it! I wonder if I am going to be totally in denial that I'll ever really be in labour! That's what it felt like!
Well I just figured that an hour of contractions wasn't going to get me that far in the whole process of labour if it really WAS labour. I also did not fancy going to the hospital, which I knew they'd ask me to do if I phoned for advice. It was late and I was tired. I knew if it really was labour that I should get some sleep and contractions would strengthen during the night or in the morning, and THEN it would be a good time to go in and be checked. They would not stop labour this far on in pregnancy anyway, they would just let it progress. If my waters broke then obviously I would go in. I can't wait till I reach 37 weeks, because the very idea that I might have to go into hospital was horrible. If I had been 37 weeks last night, I would have been so much more relaxed in myself, thinking how I can just do whatever and relax however I like, with no big trip to a noisy unfamiliar hospital full of bright lights on a dark and rainy night looming ahead of me. I can't wait till I know I can stay at home if I am in labour.
Well anyway, Neil got online and started copying out the list from Babycentre, of what to pack in your hospital bag. I haven't packed a bag yet, and we weren't sure if we might end up needing a bag that night! Neil kept a notepad on his lap while he looked online, and every time I had a contraction I would call out the time and he would write it down. It seemed to me like I was calling out the time constantly! Here's the list of my contractions, after I'd been having them for about 15 minutes without timing:
10.05
10.08
10.10
10.14
10.18
10.21
10.23
10.26
10.28
10.30
10.34
10.37
Low backache started to be persistant around here
10.41
10.43
10.48
10.51
10.53
10.56
10.58
11.04
11.06
I thought maybe the one at 11.04 was showing that things were easing off because it was 6 minutes from the last one, but that one felt so different to all the others when it came. It really hurt - the first one that did. It was the first one that made me want a hot water bottle or something to ease the cramping feeling. Neil put his hands on my belly and commented that my belly felt harder than the others, and different somehow. Like it was giving off heat! I guess my muscles were getting worked up and tired (already?!!). Anyway after the last one we timed, we decided to go to bed and try to sleep. It was the best thing to do whether I was really in labour or not, so we went up and got ready. I had a few more getting ready for bed, and then we got in bed and prayed about the timing of the birth, and about Arthur being okay, and about my nose and stuff. It took me a while to get to sleep and I was still having contractions laying on my left side, but I dropped off in the end.
I woke at the normal times in my new pattern - exactly 3am, quarter to 6am and a few other times to get up and pee. I noticed I was having contractions pretty much every time I woke up, but this morning when I woke at 9am I wasn't having any. Arthur was squirming about in there with about 20 limbs though, so I got up! Sweet boy :) I hope he didn't mind being squeezed so much last night. I keep telling him to get ready for a whole lot more squeezing than that! Poor love. It can't be fun for babies. Anyway I haven't noticed any Braxton Hicks contractions this morning, and I've been up an hour. I feel a bit crampy both front and back, sort of like I'm getting my period or something, but that's all.
So that was my interesting evening! I have to admit, I did feel kind of scared at the idea that this might be the start of labour. I knew it wasn't really, but just the possibility that it COULD be was a bit scary. I guess I am nervous because it's uncharted territory and I don't know what to expect. I don't know how painful it will get or how on earth I will cope with the pain. I don't know how long it will last or whether I'll get sick during labour. That was one thing I was pretty scared about, because I had just eaten a huge roast dinner, and I worried that my body would shut down everything digestive in order to "do" labour, and therefore I'd get sick at some point. I worried about having to go into hospital and feel out of control there - but of course that wouldn't be in my head if I was having my homebirth (from 37 weeks). I was suddenly anxious about other things that might impact on labour, like the polyp in my nose. It's so big at the moment and I sound really blocked in my nose now when I talk. I am also noticing it has turned BRIGHT red, and it stings a lot which is a new thing, so I hope it's not infected. It's been like that for a couple of days now, and I can't wait to get back to the ENT specialist tomorrow so he can take a look and treat it. I hope it's not infected. That would really be the last straw with this darn thing!! So I got scared about how that might impact my labour if it was sitting there blocking my nose and possibly being infected.
Also yesterday I started to have a scratchy throat and felt kind of achy round my glands, like I was getting a cold. I knew there had been a TON of colds around at church on Sunday morning so I was feeling pretty down about the scratchy throat. Colds aren't nice, and they're even less nice when I'm huge and pregnant and tired, but I was more concerned about the noggin in my nose, since a cold would be BAD news while it's this big! And I didn't know if the ENT guy would be able to treat it while I had a cold. So I really really need to have NO cold for my appointment tomorrow! I am expecting them to do something fairly drastic to remove or reduce it, which I'm a bit anxious about because it's likely to involve a lot of pain! But hey ho. It needs doing. Anyway today I don't have any scratchy throat or cold symptoms, so I am thanking God for that. We did pray about it last night.
My sweetie-boy has got hiccups :) Yesterday Sue came round to pray with me, and Arthur got hiccups, so I let her put her hand on my bump and feel him hiccuping! She is the first person other than Neil (and me of course!) and my parents to feel his hiccups. She seemed quite amazed! They are very clear and easy to feel if you put your hand on my bump. I wish you could all feel him hiccuping, it's so sweet!
Okay I have figured out a way to explain to those of you who haven't been pregnant yet, what it feels like when Arthur pushes his feet against my tummy. You put your palm flat against the side of your face, and then push your tongue out of that cheek as hard as you can so that it almost hurts (!!). That's a bit like how it feels to my hand when his foot is pushing out. Then push your tongue from your bottom teeth up to the top ones, pressing it out like that the whole time. Arthur does this with his foot pretty fast. Then draw a big circle with your tongue, with the same pressure. What you feel on your hand through your cheek is pretty much exactly how Arthur's feet feel through my belly as I lay my hand there to feel him! He's a strong boy :) His feet sometimes push out even further than you can make your tongue push out of your cheek. It does hurt a bit though when he pushes that hard! It's a similar feeling on my belly to the feeling in your cheek too, a sort of hard pressure with the awareness of moisture in there because his foot slides about like it's wet (which obviously, it is!). Anyway it's not weird. It's the nicest feeling! :) I suppose you would have to be excessively fond of your tongue to get the whole mushy vibe I get when I feel his little feet! ;)
We finally got the sling we are going to use to "wear" Arthur!! It's a Hug-A-Bub and it's Australian. I found some distributors here in the UK and bought one. I did wait ages for a second-hand one at eBay or UKparents but they never came up. I got some money off this one though, because I bought one that had been previously returned by another customer who needed a different size. I have been researching for ages, looking at sites where mothers chat about which slings have been the best for them, for back pain, for newborns, for breastfeeding, etc, etc. And this one seemed to stand out. It's recommended and endorsed by chiropractors and various other health professionals. It's a wrap-around sling, made from T-shirt material all over. There are 4 different positions to carry your baby/toddler in, and I just love the way it looks! I think Arthur will love it if he is keen on being carried close to my body. Neil can wear it too, which he already says he wants to do. I can breastfeed in it but it looks like that will take a lot of practise. Ours is the sage and hazelnut colour combination, and it's sooo nice!! It came with a video to show you how to tie it and how to put babies in it, and Neil and I practised putting it on. It's a huge strip of fabric (5 metres long!) which was very off-putting when I opened it out, but I think a few practise attempts will leave me perfectly fine to put it on quickly. I can't wait to put Arthur in it and snuggle him close to me! We're going to wear him to church when he's here. Everyone at church drives there, gets a large bulky travel system out of their car, straps the baby in it, and spends the service wheeling and rocking the baby about in the travel system. Some people just lift out the baby carseat and carry them in strapped into it, and they spend the service in the carseat on the floor. I always figured we'd do the same, but I'm thrilled to have found an alternative. I always had this feeling of how detached the babies and their parents look when they are just sitting in a carseat or pram or pushchair for 2 hours. They have no physical contact unless they cry so much that someone takes them out to console them, or unless they cry for a feed. It makes my heart feel achy when I think of Arthur like that. I feel achy just at the thought of him detached from me physically, even in a pram or carseat. I want my boy against my body all the time! I just do. So I can't wait to wear him. I think he will be a lot more settled than some of the other babies I've seen, because of being close to me and rocked to sleep as I move about. I hope! I don't want him to ever feel like I'm not there because he can't feel me physically. So yay, I can't wait to wear him in the sling to church! I think I will get a lot of comments, some very positive and others saying things like, "Oh he looks like he can't breathe in there!" etc. When you become a parent, why do you become the ideal target for a ton of negative advice and people feeling they suddenly have the right to voice their opinions about how they disagree with some way that you're parenting?! It is so annoying. People never bothered to comment on my life that much before, or tell me I was doing things right or wrong, so why can't they butt out now?!! Tsk. I think this will become even more annoying to me when I'm actually practising these things when Arthur is here, so I hope my diary doesn't get too ranty as a result!
Anyway this is a lonnnng diary entry and I have run out of useful things to say, so I'll stop for now. I hope my friend Mary will come round today, but I have to phone her first incase she is in labour or something, as she's due on Friday! Also the car people didn't come round and tow the old car away yesterday, so I am hoping they'll turn up this morning. Otherwise I'll have to chase them up again. And that is all! I'm going to get a drink of water and stroke my belly :)
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