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2004-08-16 - 7.46pm��previous entry��next entry
28 weeks, 3 days - nesting?
Thank you all for the lovely guestbook messages!! I like how I look when I'm pregnant too! :) Sometimes I wish I could be pregnant forever (note to Arthur: Do not take literally). Thanks also to people who have got in touch for the first time and congrats to those who are pregnant too! And thanks for more emails that I am being really useless over replying to (so sorry!). Yeah, I know I should be using my online time to reply to long-standing emails, but I got the urge to write a diary entry, so here I am! :)
I have had a really tired-out weekend, just more of what I was saying on Friday really. We did go to church yesterday though, which is good! And today I am feeling a lot less pooped. Maybe it was just to do with the exercise class? My muscles have all recovered now so maybe... But then maybe it was the bad sleep and just being in the 3rd trimester? I don't know. I am sleeping a bit better now. So long as I avoid naps in the day (no matter if I have to use matchsticks for my eyes!) then I sleep better at night. If I have taken a nap in the day, it can take me several nights before I get back to a normal night's sleep. Naps are sooooo not my friend, even when they feel nice and snuggly and helpful at the time!
I'm still uncomfy in bed at night, but I've been trying something a lady on Fertility Friend (pregnancy board) said - she said at her Bradley childbirth class (I wish I could go to one of those, I love the sound of the Bradley method!) they gave a position for sleeping in the 3rd trimester, and it's basically the recovery position with your arm pinned behind you and your leg up on a pillow. It's kind of uncomfy at first, but when you relax it feels better. I use my maternity body pillow for my leg anyway. The first time I tried it, I had been lying awake 2 hours, and I literally fell asleep within 30 seconds of getting in that position! Not so quick last night, but it still worked. So I am sleeping a little better, but still very uncomfy no matter which position I get in. Last night I woke 4 times to pee. I know this is going to happen as I get further into pregnancy now, but I hope it was to do with trying to fill my day's quota of water in the 2 hours before bed (!) rather than 3rd trimester night-peeing kicking in! I would rather that didn't happen for another few weeks if possible!
I think I am starting to be a bit nesty. I'm not sure, because I've never experienced it before. But I notice I am starting to want to.... tie up loose ends I suppose. I have made a huge list of all the things that need doing before the baby is here. I just had the urge to make a list. In fact I am longing to make lists. I am a list-maker by nature anyway, but I mean I reeeeally want to make lists at the moment! I am getting so that I can't bear the kitchen floor another second. I am DESPERATE to lay a new floor in there, like, really desperate. I feel like the act of getting down on my hands and knees and measuring out lino and cutting it to shape and sticking it down would be as refreshing as a shower right now. Seriously. I need need need to lay a new kitchen floor. I have had this urge for a month or so, but it's getting stronger every time I go in the kitchen. I have told Neil I can't last much longer so we have to go to a floor place and pick a new floor covering, and either fit it ourselves or get someone else to do it. The latter is probably a better idea. But in any case, we need to do it, otherwise I'm gonna start going a bit crazy about it!
Also today I cleared out all my clothes! I mean SERIOUSLY cleaned out. I am one of those hoardy people, the type who can't bear to part with a top that's faded and barely held together by two stitches, just because I've had it since _____ (insert fondly remembered event or year), or because I *might* wear it if I ever ____ again (insert activity that I will never in my life embark upon again). So a clearout is a big deal for me, and I usually start with good intentions and end up giving like 3 items of clothing to a charity shop or something.
Well today things felt really different. I was ruthless!! And it came really easily, it was such a "not-me" feeling! I now know that the best time for a clearout is when I am pregnant. I am beginning to think that the house stands a chance of being in the best order it's ever going to be in by the end of pregnancy! Which is cool.
I have a bin bag of clothes that are past saving or giving away, for the bin. There's another bin bag of clothes for charity. And 2 bin bags full of stuff that really hasn't been worn at all that I would like to try to sell on eBay, and if they don't sell then I'll give them to charity too. I threw away ALL my pre-pregnancy underwired bras!!!! Yikes! All of them. Just like that! I have several maternity bras in pre-pregnancy sizes that are much comfier and will support me just as well without underwire. So I threw the others out. And I threw away all my underwear from pre-pregnancy days. It's old and the stuff I was hanging onto was either getting holes (!) or really uncomfy. So I need to go knicker-shopping before too long!
I have a particular... fetish, shall we say (!!) for socks and pyjamas. It's a thing I've had since my early teens. I have way too many of both, and it is no small deal for me to throw things like that out! So today I parted with 5 pairs of pyjamas and 10 pairs of socks!!! Wow. This pregnancy thing is very helpful!
I have done all my clothes except the hanging things and my sweaters (I have lots of sweaters!), but I got too tired to do those today. Neil is going to clear his things as well, so we might just have some storage space for our clothes soon! Everything has been crammed for years and overflowing onto surfaces and the floor and yuck yuck yuck. I am beginning to find that I can't bear clutter anymore as the weeks go by. So I would say that for me, this might be the start of nesting?? I think so anyway. It's probably nothing compared to what's to come, but it's certainly different to my norm and pregnancy-related.
Arthur is still extremely wiggly and kicky! :) I LOVE feeling him wiggle about. Yesterday was another first - I got to see (not just feel) both of his feet at the same time!! I wish I could draw you a picture of my belly and where Arthur is positioned inside, because sometimes when he wiggles and kicks his position is soooo clear. His body hangs out mostly on my right side, from under my belly button right out to my side. His little bottom is about an inch or two above my belly button, but out to the right of it, and I am pretty sure his back is against my tummy, and he has his knees to his chest underneath that. When he stretches his legs out or kicks downwards, his feet hit me right in my side or up towards my ribs. He pushes them out so hard that I can actually feel his heels with my fingers! Sometimes they feel terribly sharp and I wonder if he is pointing his toes so that it's the toes that poke me (sharply) instead of his heels sometimes? Anyway yesterday he was kicking me repeatedly in the side with one little heel, and I could see it every time it hit my tummy (it bumps out about an inch every kick!). Then at the same time I saw another heel-shape kick me an inch or two below my right ribcage! So I know he has his bottom up and his head down, and he is angled out to my right side, because his right leg kicks me in the side and his left leg kicks me up towards the ribs. He is so cute. He loves when I scratch his feet when he pokes them out. It makes him go crazy kicking the same spot, or else he pushes with his hands low down to help the feet stick out even more! He's the sweetest boy :)
I should be doing kick counts by now but there's really no point. When he wakes up, he kicks me like 10 times in the first 30 seconds! So no need to count to ten and see if it falls within an hour or not!! He's a busy boy in there. I am so in love...
I am outgrowing my lovely jeans that I only just got a week or so ago! Noooo!! I put them on today and when I did the side button up they seemed kind of tight. Or filled to capacity, at least! But they are on the widest setting, so I won't be able to wear them much longer :( I am so sad. But sooooo happy to be growing even bigger and looking even MORE pregnant!! Yay!!!
Neil went up in the loft yesterday and we put all the girls clothes away :( But yay that I'm having a precious little boy!! I do still want to have a little girl as well though, one day. We also got down all the boys and unisex clothes that I had put up there in bigger sizes (up to 12 months) before we conceived. I have sorted them and I am sending some of them to the charity shop too, as some of them aren't as nice or new-looking as I remember. I am much more picky about Arthur's clothes now I am pregnant with him and besotted with him! Only the best for my little boy, etc!
Everything is folded into piles of clothes in different age groups, and I want to get a packing box down from the loft (well, get Neil to!) and pack the clothes in a box in our wardrobe, rather than plastic bags in the loft. No particular reason, I just want to do it that way.
Neil also got down the card and paper and stuff that we used for making our wedding invitations and orders of service, etc, because I am going to make baby announcement cards, and we've decided to keep to a theme that's in line with our wedding card design :) I like that. Plus it's simple and I will enjoy making them and doing some arts and crafts for a bit. I like arts and crafts :)
Hmmm, what else is there to say? Big nosebleed again at the weekend, but it was my own fault for poking my nose - first time since the last nosebleed that I've been stupid and done that! I just get annoyed with my nose because I'm soooo sniffly with pregnancy, and my nose gets yucky and also irritated and itchy, so I poke it. Naughty. So of course it bled. Not nearly as heavily as in France, but it did bleed pretty well and kept going for 20 minutes or so. I only slightly panicked at first because of the association with how terrified I was last time it bled, but then I managed it fine. Pesky nose.
Arthur is wiggling his feet. He's so lovely!
Lately I keep feeling scared to lose him. I feel like I am waaaaay too deep in love with him to be able to survive it if he were to die. Not that there's any reason that he will, but it's just a scary thought sometimes in my head. Stillbirths happen. Cord accidents happen. I get scared that my healthy active boy could still not make it out of my womb alive, and that is just unbearable to think about now. I shouldn't think about it then, if it bothers me so much, but sometimes it just creeps in there and I'm thinking about it before I realise. I love him so much. I'm so glad he's such an active baby, because that way I get constant reassurance. I just keep thinking how gut-wrenchingly terrible it would be to have silence and stillness in my womb now that I'm used to such activity and life in there. *shudder*
Well now would be a good time to stop writing this entry if I'm onto a train of thought like that one! We are having spaghetti bolognese tonight and I'm sooooooooo hungry I could eat half the kitchen worktop while I wait for it to cook (!), so I'm gonna go and help Neil cook it. He brought home a slice of double chocolate cheesecake as a treat - mmmmm!!!! I know my body does not really need chocolate cheesecake, but who cares! My mouth is watering just writing about it! And Arthur is wiggly, so I think he would like some too :) And I'm going to go now and watch the food wistfully as it cooks. And I really really will try to be better at replying to emails soon!
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